Sometimes it’s just important to get off the bus rather than wait for the perfect stop to come along, don’t you think? Do you know what I mean? We can wait our whole lives just looking out of the window at the world going by, pretending that we are just waiting until the perfect time to get off, until suddenly it’s too late.
Existential Therapy explains that we do this because of our fear of death, apparently (I know, they’re such a doomy lot). The thinking being that the payment for life is death, and if we do not join in the merry throng of life, we somehow get forgotten and cheat death. Maybe? Or it maybe that it’s just sometimes scary to get off the bus.
I was thinking all this recently when I sold my motorbike to Chef Fu. Who he?
Chef Fu’s Story
I did actually sell a motorbike last week. I put adverts in the free online press pages, as you do, and didn’t get much response, until one evening I came across a large Chinese man bumbling about in our front garden looking for a motorbike. He’d seen the advert, it wasn’t bizarre serendipity.
Chef Fu was born in Hong Kong, the son of a restaurant owner. It was a small street side noodle restaurant, of which there are thousands all over Hong Kong and China, and he quickly became absorbed into the family business. He grew up cooking noodles.
Over the years he built up his reputation and saved enough money to start a restaurant of his own. He was keen to move out of China and decided that the best place to open his noodle restaurant was Chiang Mai. So here he was, the famous Chef Fu from Hong Kong, in my garden buying my motorbike.
I asked him why he had still not opened his restaurant “am looking for perfect place,” he said, “…have been looking for two year.” He added.
In my mind I thought, “it’s hard to get off the bus.” In words I said “oh, right, yes, and here’s the log book.”
Five Sure Fire Ways To Stop The Endless Waiting
There is a very good reason why Samurai Warriors are trained to make all decisions within seven breaths. Waiting keeps us stuck. Perfect timing is a myth.
Here are five sure fire ways to stop waiting and procrastinating, and get off the bus:
Fear of the Unknown
Whether it’s the unconscious existential fear of death, or whether it’s just bloody scary, the fear of the unknown can keep us on that bus for ever. There is no way around this. There is no way to avoid the fear of stepping off and the inevitable commitment to whatever it is that you are stepping into. The best thing to do is to get help, talk to people you can trust, be open about your fears, get advice, and don’t hesitate to seek out professional support from whoever you need.
Worst Case Scenario
What’s the very worst thing that can happen? We often operate in extremes and think about the worst, nightmare scenarios. Work out the worst case scenario and then work out a plan to deal with it. If the worst came to the worst, what would you actually do?
Get Your Facts Right
Depending upon what it is that you are stepping into, make sure that you know what you are doing, don’t trust to luck, find out all the hard facts.
Create a Back Up Plan
As Nanny Margret (the old lady who lived next door to us in Devon, England) used to say, “don’t put all your eggs in one basket.” She also used to say that unless you boiled mushrooms for at least an hour they would kill you, but, we’ll ignore that one. So, remembering Nanny Margret’s advice, let’s not put all our faith in one plan (you can also boil mushrooms if you want, but that’s optional). Make as many back up plans as necessary.
Speak Positive Live Positive
Negativity becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. If we think we are not going to succeed, and talk about not succeeding then the likelihood is that we will fail. Make sure that you know, deep down, that your plan can work. It maybe scary, it maybe risky, it may push you out of your comfort zone, but at least you will be able to step off that bus, cook the finest noodles on the planet and live to boil mushrooms for as long as you want.
Thanks for reading.
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